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Are You Positively or Negatively Influenced

Who’s In Control?

Are you an influence to other people or do you allow yourself to be influenced by them? The truth is, you will not always encounter people that are nice to you. Every person has a number of daily interactions with people that are polite and with those that are not so polite. Part of it involves the social environment that exists within popular culture and part of it results from the circumstances that you might find yourself in at any given time. The truth is, you cannot always control how other people act around you but you have complete control over the way that you respond to it.


Facilitator : Use two commonly known individuals to illustrate negative influence vs positive influence.  Also, describe how someone or something negativity influenced your life and how that situation was positively resolved. 


1). Whether good or bad who are you influenced  by the most, and how have they impacted your life?

2). Who do you think is looking up to you to be a positive influence in their life?

3). What do you have complete control over? 


Positive Energy…

Do you choose to commit yourself to a daily attitude that can serve as a positive influence for other individuals? If you fail to do this, there is a good chance that you will end up allowing yourself to be negatively impacted by the personality of someone who is angry and bitter. Whether a person is confrontational or not, you have the opportunity to spread positive energy or continue spreading the negative energy that came from someone else. The choice is yours. Remember that no one can make you act out toward others, no matter what they do. You are the one who chooses how you will act.  Most people do not get out of bed saying that they want to hurt someone’s feelings or spread anger and bitterness everywhere they go. Despite this fact, it tends to happen on many different occasions. If it is happening to you, it is probably because you are not allowing your true character to shine through. Granted, it can be difficult but it is important that you refuse to allow the negativity of others to impact the way you choose to live your life.


Facilitator : share real life scenarios of what you are intentional about. For example, waking up early to exercise, going to your children’s school functions, arriving to work on time. 


4). Life is about choices. Do you wake up every morning with the intent to influence someone’s life for the better, or do you go about your day with a “go with the flow attitude”?

5). Instead of responding to the negativity that is around you, what can you choose to do to spread positive energy?


Kind Gestures…

It all comes down to having the conviction that is necessary to make a conscious decision to change the lives of others for the better. This does not mean that you have to do some grandiose thing. Simply smiling at someone or saying hello to someone that is having a bad day can make all the difference in the world for that particular individual. In truth, several small gestures are probably more important than one enormous one.


Facilitator : Share how you use small kind gestures to avoid negative behavior.


6). Are you concerned about the feelings of others?

7). What small gestures can you make to uplift someone everyday?



Do Something Constructive…

Without a doubt, it is sometimes easy to get wrapped up into the idea of being less than kind to others, especially when it seems like you are having a day where the whole world is against you. The best way to achieve your decision to refuse to spread negativity is to take a few moments for yourself when you are feeling stressed. Take a breath and allow all of it to go. If you must, find something constructive that you can put all of your frustration into so that you do not take it out on others. A strenuous workout or playing sports are excellent examples. You will be a better person for it, and you are likely to have a positive impact on other people who are in need of a few kind words themselves.


  • Me time is vitally important to maintaining a positive attitude.
  • How much time during the day do you take to collect yourself from all of your daily activities?
  • When you influence others in a positive way it makes you feel good about yourself and the world around you.


*Key 🔑 Before you respond to negativity STOP and ask yourself will my reaction be worth the possible consequences?



  • a projector for videos – empowerment speaker (Eric Thomas).
  • weights for use of constructive exercise
  • proof of statistics 
  • easels to post images of people who have negativity and positively impacted people. 
  • note cards for questions 


Discussion Questions: 

1. You cannot control how other people act around you. (true or false)

2. What do you have complete control over?

3. What type of energy do you have the opportunity to spread?

4. Several  small gestures are probably more important than what?

5. If you are frustrated what are some things that you can do to avoid spreading negative energy?



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